Break Up - Part V

Henry Smash

Full of fury and hate, I begin to grab dishes that were left to dry and have been sitting there for days and break them. I didn’t even bother throw them, instead they sort of slip out of my hands, as if I picked it up and in a sudden motion, it flew out.

Lily barked at the first smash, but is silent after the third or fourth. After a few minutes, I settled down and curled in the corner between the stove and counter.

I hold my head in my palms, “Why would she lie to me? After everything we’ve been through and all those years of being together! Why me, huh? Why did I get stuck loving you, who didn’t love me back?” And then, I break into a hysterical sob.

“You could have made it easier for us if you hadn’t said yes. Why me? Of all fucking guys?” 

Suddenly, in a change of emotion, I started to smirk, “Then again, why you? Out of all – Selene was a good girl, she cooked day in and day out, never missed a beat. But she wouldn’t deal with it. There was Naomi, she, she was a good fuck. The way her ass filled her jeans, and her tongue, God,” I look up,” That was the best thing you gave the girl. But, no, I chose you. Out of all...” I sit there in my own pity, and swallow tears that I couldn’t deal with at the moment.

I lift myself up and head to the refrigerator in search of a beer only to remember I already ran out.

Suddenly, with a gush of euphoria, I spot the vodka bottle I just took shots out of, “My dear love, where have you run of to?”

(To the next world)

No, that was something I couldn’t spend time thinking about. I poured myself another shot out of joy of a new life. 

But I can’t let go so easily, “You know, it all had to happen. The way it did - the break up. She wanted more, I don’t. Have more. You suck. We all just want a good fuck, Meli. You dumb, bitch. Fuck you,” I swayed out of the kitchen and into the living room. The lights were dimmed low and the windows drawn open. They were a light tan color with vertical crisscrossed lines, resembling DNA. I remember  that because Meli chose them for that specific purpose. She, above all, always wanted to be some sort of fucking scientist, I knew that.

She said, “These lines are what contain everything that makes us. Neat, huh, Hun?”

“Yeah, real fucking neat,” as he made a sour face.

Now they stood here slowly swaying back and forth from the light touch of his hands as he drew them close.

“I wonder how she’s doing, I should call her,” I start to look for my phone, but I can’t find it. I just want to leave one voicemail, so she knows that I’m thinking of her and want her to be safe tonight.

But we all know how this goes. One call turns into several. And I know I’ll lose my shit if she doesn’t answer the phone after the second ring.

He backed away from the window and sat down on the couch right in front of the porch door. He had never felt so alone. These thoughts were so uncomfortable to process with an empty hand. Before he knew it, he had already made his way to the kitchen and poured himself another shot.

Ahhh.