The Alternatives

Evening, Motherlovers. Does anyone have children? And by children, I mean pets? My husband likes to say that he can only compare giving child birth to the worst pain he has experience, which is slamming his pinky toe - and he's had poison ivy. Therefore, I can only compared having children to owning pets. I kid. Here's the thing, every morning my cat feels it his duty to wake us up as soon as he is up. As soon as it turns five, he feels it is perfect timing. Chalupa Batman jumps at at the bed, all while meowing, and heads on over to my side, and comes and touches my face with his nose. I don't move, but it wakes me -  but only that half ass wake up. He sees me not moving, so he heads over to my belly and begins to press up and down, continuously, until I get up, and by then, he has already won. But, it doesn't end there. He needs food and water, and I have to open the door for him so he can get out to the balcony. Oh! And he likes to be pet, a lot. Soon, h...